Why Mitt Romney can’t beat President Obama.

I’ve been talking with quite a few friends and have seen a number of polls and pundits saying the same thing: Mitt Romney is probably the only candidate that can beat Barack Obama.

Really?  Mitt Romney?

I think you have the wrong Mormon.  

Since he threw his hat into the ring (and recently took it out), I’ve always said that Huntsman had the GOP’s best chance against Obama, but that’s neither here nor there since he’s already dropped out and was never going to win.  People’s bar for competency has been set so low for the GOP that for some reason they are starting to think that people suddenly like Mitt Romney.

Just because he’s not the only one who isn’t a raving lunatic doesn’t make him a formidable candidate.  In fact, despite his “best chance” of beating Obama, I believe he is the most easily dismantled on a general election front—For several reasons that have been right in front of us this whole time.

1. O-Romney-Care.

Despite its unpopularity, Barack Obama could use the election vs. Obama to really sell his Affordable Care Act, simply because it’s been wildly successful in Massachusetts and Romney’s health care advisors MET with Obama to design the national model version of Romney’s health care plan.  All Obama has to say at the debates is: “Mitt, why are you rejecting the health care model that made your state second in the nation for health care?  Your guys met with my guys and you even said it’d be a good national model.  Shouldn’t you be endorsing this?”  Cue Romney’s creepy laugh and the sound of his poll numbers dropping.

2. Bain Capital.

When you get Republicans to wage “class warfare” on each other, you know some serious shit must have happened.  On the stage of a general election, and with Romney touting job creation (with no actual evidence that he directly contributed to the jobs created by Domino’s and Staples), the people whom he fired are going to come out of the woodwork to tell their stories.

3.  He’s John Kerry.

He’s unexciting, he’s unappealing, he’s flip flopped on even more positions than Kerry ever did and he, as MIchael Savage once so unceremoniously described the 2004 Democratic nominee, also has a face that would scare small children.

 His party isn’t excited about him and if he gets the nomination (which is essentially inevitable even if Gingrich wins South Carolina), it will be even more lukewarm (can something be MORE lukewarm or is just cold at that point?) than Kerry’s.  Plus, Obama just has to take a page from Bush’s playbook (he’s been good at that lately) and say: “You may not agree with where I stand, but at least you know where I stand.”  Boom. 

4.  You know… The Mormon thing.

Mormonism has a more positive image in America than ever before.  People are more accepting of them, more people consider them Christians and many people believe our nation is ready for a Mormon leader, and personally I would have no problem with a Mormon being leader, as is evident since I am fond of Huntsman.  The problem is that when an election goes national, it gets ugly.  Every last little thing about somebody’s past (or present) is dug up and used against them.  With 2008 we had Bill Ayers and Jeremiah Wright.  Hell, people even tried to use Obama’s days as a community organizer against him.  How on earth do you spin helping poor and unemployed members of churches find work as a bad thing?  I guess if you’re a Republican, helping poor people is pretty bad.

Anyway, every last weird thing about Mormonism’s history and current practice is going to be dug up in the general election.  If Obama wanted to, which he never would, he could even say at a debate “Tell me, Mitt, if I were a member of your church in 1977 and I wanted to get married in the temple that is necessary for eternal salvation, why wouldn’t I be allowed in?”  Temple robes, polygamy, Brigham Young claiming God had physical sex with Mary, becoming a god with your own planet, “magic” underwear.  All those things are going to come up and while many people may dismiss it as oppressive negativity, it, combined with the three prior reasons I listed is why Mitt Romney will lose to Barack Obama in November.